Anger Management

 

Why learning to control your anger is important?

You might think that venting your anger is healthy, that the people around you are too sensitive, that your anger is justified, or that you need to show your fury to get respect. But the truth is that anger is much more likely to damage your relationships, impair your judgment, get in the way of success, and have a negative impact on the way people see you.

  • Out-of-control anger hurts your physical health

Constantly operating at high levels of stress and tension is bad for your health. Chronic anger makes you more susceptible to heart disease, diabetes, high cholesterol levels, a weakened immune system, insomnia, and high blood pressure.

  • Out-of-control anger hurts your mental health

Chronic anger consumes huge amounts of mental energy and clouds your thinking, making it harder to concentrate, see the bigger picture, and enjoy life. It can also lead to stress, depression, and other mental health problems.

  • Out-of-control anger hurts your career

Constructive criticism, creative differences, and heated debate can be healthy. But lashing out only alienates your colleagues, supervisors, or clients and erodes their respect. What’s more, a bad reputation can follow you wherever you go, making it harder and harder to get ahead.

  • Out-of-control anger hurts your relationships with others

It causes lasting scars in the people you love most and gets in the way of your friendships and work relationships. Chronic, intense anger makes it hard for others to trust you, speak honestly, or feel comfortable—they never know what is going to set you off or what you will do. Explosive anger is especially damaging to children.

Explore what’s really behind your anger

If you’re struggling with out-of-control anger, you may be wondering why your fuse is so short. Anger problems often stem from what you’ve learned as a child. If you watched others in your family scream, hit each other, or throw things, you might think this is how anger is supposed to be expressed. Traumatic events and high levels of stress can make you more susceptible to anger as well.

Anger is often a cover-up for other feelings

In order to get your needs met and express your anger in appropriate ways, you need to be in touch with what you are really feeling. Are you truly angry? Or is your anger masking other feelings such as embarrassment, insecurity, hurt, shame, or vulnerability?

If your knee-jerk response in many situations is anger, it is very likely that your temper is covering up your true feelings and needs. This is especially likely if you grew up in a family where expressing feelings was strongly discouraged. As an adult, you may have a hard time acknowledging feelings other than anger.

Clues that there’s something more to your anger

  • You have a hard time compromising

Is it hard for you to understand other people’s points of view, and even harder to concede a point? If you grew up in a family where anger was out of control, you may remember how the angry person got his or her way by being the loudest and most demanding. Compromising might bring up scary feelings of failure and vulnerability.

  • You have trouble expressing emotions other than anger

Do you pride yourself on being tough and in control, never letting your guard down? Do you feel that emotions like fear, guilt, or shame don’t apply to you? Everyone has those emotions, and if you think you don’t, you may be using anger as a cover for them.

  • You view different opinions and viewpoints as a personal challenge to you

Do you believe that your way is always right and get angry when others disagree? If you have a strong need to be in control or a fragile ego, you may interpret other perspectives as a challenge to your authority, rather than simply a different way of looking at things.

 

Causes of depression in older adults and the elderly

As you grow older, you face significant life changes that can put you at risk for depression. Causes and risk factors that contribute to depression in older adults and the elderly include:

  • Health problems

Illness and disability; chronic or severe pain; cognitive decline; damage to body image due to surgery or disease.

  • Loneliness and isolation

Living alone; a dwindling social circle due to deaths or relocation; decreased mobility due to illness or loss of driving privileges.

  • Reduced sense of purpose

Feelings of purposelessness or loss of identity due to retirement or physical limitations on activities.

  • Fears

Fear of death or dying; anxiety over financial problems or health issues.

  • Recent bereavement

The death of friends, family members, and pets; the loss of a spouse or partner.

  • Get out in to the world

Try not to stay cooped up at home all day. Go to the park, take a trip to the hairdresser, or have lunch with a friend.

  • Participate in activities you enjoy

Pursue whatever hobbies or pastimes bring or used to bring you joy.

  • Volunteer your time

Helping others is one of the best ways to feel better about yourself and regain perspective.

  • Take care of a pet

Get a pet to keep you company.

  • Learn a new skill

Pick something that you’ve always wanted to learn, or that sparks your imagination and creativity.

  • Create opportunities to laugh

Laughter provides a mood boost, so swap humorous stories and jokes with your loved ones, watch a comedy, or read a funny book.

  • Maintain a healthy diet

Avoid eating too much sugar and junk food. Choose healthy foods that provide nourishment and energy, and take a daily multivitamin.


Is it always bad to feel angry?

Anger is a natural response to feeling attacked, injured or violated. It’s part of being human; it’s energy seeking expression. Our anger can be our friend. It helps us survive, giving us the strength to fight back or run away when attacked or faced with injustice.  In itself, it’s neither good nor bad, but it can be frightening.

Angry feelings can lead to destructive and violent behaviour, and so we tend to be frightened of anger. The way we are brought up, and our cultural background, will very much influence how we feel about expressing anger. You may have been punished for expressing it when you were small, or you may have witnessed your parents’ or other adults’ anger when it was out of control, destructive and terrifying. Or you may have been frightened by the strength of your own bad temper. All of this encourages you to suppress your anger.

 

 

 
 

 

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